Archive for the ‘uniquely italian’ Category
Note to Paris Hilton: That’s Not Hot
For those of you who don’t know, today is a holiday in Italy. Every December 8, the country has the day off for the Immaculate Conception. And yes, the separation of church and state is the law here. Why do you ask?
So, since it’s a yearly free day, I’ve chosen December 8 as the day my house turns into Christmas Village. And that’s what I did all morning. Harry Connick Jr. serenaded me while I put up our mini-tree (no room for much else) and other assorted cheer.
When I got tired of Frosty melting away (am I the only one who finds that song kinda sad?), I put on the television.
Um, when did Paris Hilton become important enough to do telefonino (cell phone) commercials in Italy? Who has allowed this? I doubt most Italians have the faintest clue as to who she is, even if she is pictured sometimes in the gossip rags. But still…is she *really* going to make them switch phone service?
The funniest part of the ads is one of three things. I can’t decide. In the running are:
(1) Her trying to speak Italian. Horrendous doesn’t begin to describe it. Let’s just say that I had to translate Paris’s Italian into actual Italian for P;
(2) Her voice is dubbed over in some of the ads; or
(3) The voice over girl was apparently given instructions to speak Italian only slightly less horrendously than Paris and (most importantly) to keep the valley girl American accent.
That Paris appears in these ads with one of Italy’s most beloved actors, Claudio Amendola, is more disturbing than funny, so that didn’t make the list. But at least she’s not playing opposite La Loren (who does spots for a different company). Imagine the horror!
So what I’m really wondering is this: is there a way we can petition to get this, um, girl off of Italian airwaves–a way to tell “Tre” that these ads are so *not hot* here?
Has Italy plain run out of people famous for no reason other than their wealth? Aren’t there some Agnelli or DeLaurentis kids running around blowing their inheritances? Or how about members of the ex-royal family now that they’re allowed back in?
Sorry for the rant, but hearing Queen Daft butcher one of the most beautiful languages in the world has effectively drained my Christmas cheer.
Maybe I should go back the dying snowman for a pick-me-up.
Conquering Italian Bureaucracy: Getting My Carta d’Identità
Ah, Italian bureaucracy. Didn’t take long to get me on this subject, did it? But it’s actually not a criticism! If you’ve got a pen handy, mark this down, as it’s probably the only time you’ll see me happy about something involving a comune and official stamps.
Yesterday I finally got my carta d’identità, the Italian ID card. This marks the end of a long journey to Italian citizenship — dual citizenship actually. So I’m allowed to have two citizenships because of a neat little thing Italian bureaucrats call “jure sanguinis,” or law of the blood.
No, there’s no organized crime involved. Geez, why you always gotta go there when blood and Italian are mentioned together? It just means that when the Italian bloodline is intact, i.e., no one has renounced his/her Italian citizenship before the next in line was born, Italian citizenship carries on down.
For me, it was from my great-grandfather, grandmother, and father–and yes, it required a lot of paperwork. Birth, marriage, death, and divorce certificates, and then a two and a half year wait. But now it’s done, and I’m legal here. Finally.
So, to celebrate, I’ll share my first photo. This is the view of the Ionian Sea from my house in a village of just 300 souls–most of whom remember American soldiers coming into the piazza and handing out chocolate to the children to close out World War II.
Michelle Kaminsky is an American attorney-turned-freelance writer who lived in her family's ancestral village in Calabria, Italy for 15 years. This blog is now archived.
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