Fun with Statistics 101

Well if that title didn’t hook you, you’re my kind of person. I’m not fond of statistics myself–as the saying goes, anywhere from 1 to 100% of them are made up anyway.

But not those on my Google Analytics account! They tell me who’s visiting my blog, where they’re from, how long they stayed–and there are graphs and lines and bars, oh my!

What I find most interesting, though, is how my visitors find me.

Most searches are looking for information on malocchio, Italian superstitions, Italian language (yes, you can use “ciao” for hello and goodbye; “ciao bella” is “hello, beautiful”), life as an expat in Italy, Calabrian food, dialect, traditions, holidays, etc., recipes (banana cake, spaghetti aglio olio peperoncino, zeppole, rabbit), dog menstruation (a few searches looked specifically for “Luna Balloona“–is she *that* famous?), grandmothers, the JFK assassination, and seeing an old crush.

I couldn’t have done a better job of summing up my life than that right there.

What’s that? You want a gratuitous Luna photo? Twist my arm! OK, OK.

Moving on.

Once before I tried to answer some questions that came up in my stats, and I think it’s time again. Oh, and for the people (that’s plural) who continue to wonder about smoking basil, please go here as it’s been, in legal terms, asked and answered.

(1) Do snails bleed?

I believe Shakespeare already covered this general premise in “The Merchant of Venice,” but if I have to spell it out: yes.

(2) Why do anchovy [sic] appear to be yawning?

Because they’re light sleepers and have disrupted REM sleep, which leads to inadequate rest. Accordingly, they appear to be yawning because they are. They swim around all day trying to accomplish anchovy goals (including but not limited to staying out of fishing nets), and they get run down just like the rest of us. Cut them some slack, would you?

(3) Why do Italians go to Nana’s every day?

Because they love her, dammit!

Aside from questions, sometimes a kindred spirit finds me: “I hate Telecom.” Sing it my brother/sister!

Other times I just get a prompt for a short story: “Nutella and her hot friend waiting for you.”

And, when I’m extra lucky, I even get unsolicited advice (this from two different locations): “Never try to teach a cat algebra, it frustrates you and annoys the cat.”

Duly noted.


[tags]google analytics, dogs[/tags]

23 Beans of Wisdom to “Fun with Statistics 101”
  1. alicia

    “Why do Italians go to Nana’s every day?”

    Haha, that reminds me of my best friend and how the entire bunch of her extended family (that lives within 20 miles) go to her “Nana’s” constantly. It’s her mother’s mother, and the fraction of Italian in the family is on her FATHER’S side!

  2. Heather

    The things people search for always crack me up! I am forever getting Italian soccer searches after ONE post during the world cup.

  3. Anonymous

    a luna balloona search ha h ah ha. WOnder how many hits they got??!!!

  4. The Other Girl

    Poor Nutella. People only talk to her so she’ll introduce them to her hot friend.

    Luna! I love her fancy collar.

  5. Anonymous


    I want my life to look more like Luna’s!

    Ciao, ciao….

  6. sognatrice

    Alicia, I don’t think any ethnicity really corners the market on grandmothers πŸ˜‰

    Heather, yup, all it takes is just one post!

    Anon, all I know is that I’m not telling Luna Balloona lest she get a big head to go on top of the blingin’ collar.

    TheOG, well, Nutella is spreadable, so she’s got that going for her. Luna says thank you πŸ™‚

    Wunschdenker, she has it rough let me tell you. Right now, she’s looking pretty much like that photo.

  7. Louise

    You are TOO funny!!
    Got a chuckle out of that one!!
    I LOVE NUTELLA!!! Kind of a freak about it….LOL!
    Have a great day!!

  8. Erin

    Loved the post! Very, very funny. I’m always checking my stat counter too, I’m quite nosy! Have a fun day.

  9. cheeky

    Sorry but when I saw Luna I really couldn’t concentrate on anything else. What did you say? Oh, blah, blah, blah . . . I honestly don’t mean to offend. (do snails bleed, mmhhh?) I love that photo and yes I could possibly fall victim to dog stalking; is there such a thing?

  10. nyc/caribbean ragazza

    I did one post on that Fergie song (fergielicious) and recevied a slew of hits. Who knew she had so many fans?

  11. Bongga Mom

    Luna is a gorgeous dog πŸ™‚

    BTW Thanks for the link to the sun safety page! The test was fun, especially since I got an A! And here is the proper link to my SV Moms Blog post:

  12. Bongga Mom

    I don’t know if that link went thru properly, I’ll try again:

    click here

    anyway, the post is up on the site πŸ™‚

  13. Wanderlust Scarlett

    Loved this one! How fun! I set up the tracking thing on mine… and just like I do with all new and shiny toys, I won’t be able to put it down.
    I shall be perched on the edge of my chair, hovering over the keyboard… staring into my monitor with anticipation…

    OH MY GOSH. Can’t believe that.
    I need to go to the library before my brain rots right out of my head.

    I did look through the contents of my Google search box to see what I’ve searched for in the last 30 days… eek, is all I can say. I’m blaming most of it on spring semester essays and finals.



  14. Sara

    There’s no such thing as a gratuitous Luna picture! Not gratuitous! Never gratuitous!

    hee hee hee — so cute!

  15. John Kaiser

    Heck, I don’t remember how I got here. lol.

  16. Anonymous

    you brighten my day sognitrice!

    -reader in Cali who doesn’t have a blog

  17. Ally Bean

    Interesting info in those stats. It seems that the reasons they find your blog are very positive ones– which I think is a good thing. I should look at mine more closely, but I’m afraid of what I’ll find!!

  18. Listen to your Heart.......David

    On reading your intro, I immediately thought I am going to love this blog! However on reading your first post doubts began to creep in!! but no, by the time I had finished, I was smiling, and thought this girls got it!:)) Anchovies yawning! I wont forget that one very easily:)

  19. Shan

    You crack me up!

  20. sognatrice

    Louise, Erin, glad you enjoyed πŸ™‚

    Cheeky, I know Luna is distracting. You should try getting any work done while she’s nearby!

    NYC, certainly not I. I hope I don’t get those hits now that you’ve written that awful word in my comments πŸ˜‰

    Bongga mom, thanks for the comment and the link!

    Scarlett, the stats counter can be quite addicting, especially for a naturally curious person…best of luck staying away as much as possible.

    Sara, Luna is *very* happy to hear that. She’s posing right now, but I won’t. I won’t do it!

    John, oh, but *I* do πŸ˜‰

    Reader in Cali, thanks for taking the time to comment–you’ve brightened my day πŸ™‚

    Ally, I haven’t gotten many perverted searches, I think b/c of all the real porn sites, mine doesn’t register too high up on those kind of search terms. You should definitely check yours out–it’s free entertainment!

    David, thank you. I hope “it” is a positive thing πŸ˜‰

    Shan, and you me!

  21. JennDZ

    I am addicted to my google stats as well..isn’t it so much fun!All I can say from mine is that people are OBSESSED with leftover steak recipes….and…”Gianna” De Laurentiis and Sicily

  22. Shelley - At Home in Rome

    Well, if this doesn’t finally convince me to put Google analytics on my site (thing that Sara over at Ms. has been urging me to do for ages) I don’t know what will. What the heck is up with those questions? I am mystified and intrigued. And a bit creeped out by how much Google can tell you. Yikes.

  23. sognatrice

    Jenn, you gotta love the hits looking for “Gianna” πŸ˜‰

    Shelley, you must do it. If you’re looking for a few minutes of cheap (free) entertainment, Google Analytics is the way to go.

Michelle KaminskyMichelle Kaminsky is an American attorney-turned-freelance writer who lived in her family's ancestral village in Calabria, Italy for 15 years. This blog is now archived. 

Calabria Guidebook

Calabria travel guide by Michelle Fabio



Homemade apple butter
Green beans, potatoes, and pancetta
Glazed Apple Oatmeal Cinnamon Muffins
Pasta with snails alla calabrese
Onion, Oregano, and Thyme Focaccia
Oatmeal Banana Craisin Muffins
Prosciutto wrapped watermelon with bel paese cheese
Fried eggs with red onion and cheese
Calabrian sausage and fava beans
Ricotta Pound Cake