Archive for the ‘me me me’ Category
sunday scribblings: ocean
Prompt #58: Ocean
Ah, the ocean. Many have fond memories of going to the beach as a child, frolicking in the sand, building sandcastles, getting tossed around in the waves.
Not me.
I remember going to Atlantic City with my grandmother once when I was small, but we didn’t actually get near the water as it was too cold. And yes, for those in the Mid-Atlantic region of the US, I’m talking about “going to the shore” here. Cheesesteaks optional but advised.
So my first time near a large body of water was in college when some friends and I went to Morehead City (accent on the first syllable; make your own jokes please), North Carolina. Is that possible? Nearly 20 years of my life without knowing the ocean?
Entirely. From the middle of Pennsylvania, where I am from, the ocean is several hours away; those from the Midwest may have even more dramatic horror stories. Add to that a family that was never, say, enamored with the water or vacations, and it’s not too hard to understand. Of course it is a bit strange if you consider that I now live minutes from the crystal clear Ionian Sea, a northern Italian and European holiday hotspot.
So when I was 19 years old, I got thrown around by the waves of the Atlantic Ocean for the first time. Scary at the start, but then simply glorious. Being flipped and turned beyond your control really puts the world into perspective for anyone, let alone a 19-year-old college kid.
I remember feeling so small, insignificant, powerless. And happy. Deliriously happy.
It was the perfect time to feel and understand that I was just a tiny piece of the larger puzzle of the world. At the time, I was attending an ultra-competitive university with students who often fit every stereotype you could imagine; it was easy to get suckered into thinking that every decision, including actually eating dinner instead of having half of a plain baked potato, would affect my Entire Future.
Should I continue with German? Should I double major? Should I break down and take a math course? Can I fit in another part-time job? This was critical stuff!
Having nothing to do but lie on the beach, read some novels, and frolic, yes frolic, in the water was the perfect wind-down to another physically and emotionally draining school year; as it turned out, my introduction to the ocean happened exactly when I needed it and, perhaps more importantly, when I was ready to accept it.
I think that when you haven’t grown up with something, your adult years can either find you strangely drawn toward it or still keeping your distance.
With the ocean, I’m somewhere in between. I’m not afraid of the water, although I’ll admit I’m not entirely comfortable on a boat where I can no longer see land. If you haven’t guessed, I’ve never been on a cruise, but I’d welcome the chance if, you know, I won one or something.
On the other hand, I’m definitely not addicted to the sea either–a minor sin here, in fact, where I’m asked nearly every day in the summer if I had gone “al mare,” to the sea. Thank goodness I found P, who isn’t appassionato either, proving one of P’s (and now my) favorite sayings: “Dio li fa e poi li accoppia.” This is the equivalent of our “birds of a feather flock together,” but literally (and much prettier, I think): “God makes them and then matches them up.”
So while not al mare every day, I do enjoy quiet times at the beach when there are few others around. Lucky for me, Italians are quite rigid on when they go to the beach, so those early March and late September days? The beach and the moist, salty air? Pretty much all mine.
I imagine this might change a bit if I have children, though, because I would want them to be comfortable with the water and have all those sweet, frolicky memories that so many others have–although building sandcastles probably isn’t going to happen on our beaches here.
And so, I am at peace with the fact that the ocean and I have a bit of a strained relationship. I wouldn’t die if I wasn’t near it, but then again, that crisp, fresh air and cool water feels oh so good when the sun is warming my cheeks and shoulders (properly covered in sunscreen, of course).
But for now I’ll continue to take it in small doses until the Ionian, which surely knows more than I, pulls me to know it a little better.
And then I will open myself up to whatever it has to offer.
P.S. You can find more images of the sea here.
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[tags]ocean, sea, ionian sea, badolato[/tags]
secrets to my success
The lovely Emma at How to Italy has tagged me to share five things I do nearly every day to be successful. I love this idea. For me, it’s inspiring to read about others’ good, productive habits especially since we so often hear the harmful, destructive ones (which we all have as well).
But first a word on success–a slippery word that can and should be defined by each of us individually. I consider myself successful if I can end the day with a smile and the feeling that I did what I could as well as I could’ve. Does it happen everyday? Hardly. But I like to think the following habits make it more likely:
1. After I wake up, I spend fifteen minutes sitting on the balcony with Luna and my beverage of choice, usually coffee but sometimes fresh-squeezed orange juice (season-permitting). When I say “sitting on the balcony,” I mean literally. I plop my bum down on Luna level, and we have our own pettie and snuggle time in the sunshine if the weather cooperates, and if the weather doesn’t cooperate, we share our moments inside in the kitchen. These quiet, relaxed moments before the day kicks up are important for me.
Here are some photos from a recent pettie and snuggle session:
2. While we’re on the subject of Luna, we take at least 3 walks per day (usually more). I probably wouldn’t do this on my own without a canine companion, so thank goodness she’s with us. Being in touch with nature gives me inspiration, thinking time, and an overall calm feeling that everything around me is exactly as it should be for one reason or another. It also gives me an excuse to take even more photos despite the fact that the locals think I’m a tad wacky getting so close to trees and whatnot.
3. I tell someone I love them. Always P, but if I’ve spoken to my mom or dad that day, I’ve told them too. For as long as I can remember, my mom has always told me she loves me at the end of every phone call–and this was when we lived just a town apart. It’s something I’ve continued with my family members over the phone and with P in person, daily. I don’t think you can ever say “I love you” too much.
4. I go on the Internet (when Telecom cooperates). This may sound odd, but since I’ve had the Internet installed in the house about a year ago, I’ve felt so much more in touch with the world and comfortable with my life here. Whether it’s the news, celebrity gossip, other blogs, or personal emails, I need and crave this contact with civilization outside of southern Italy. It makes me feel more alive and part of something larger, and that’s a good feeling.
5. I write. Could just be a blog entry (no offense readers!) or an email or thirty, but every day I write something, which they say is good for a writer. In fact, blogging has increased my “other” writing productivity as ideas spring up at every turn–finding the time and discipline to follow all of them through is the more difficult part. Back to number 4, though, and reading other writers’ blogs inspires me to continue.
So there are my five things. I won’t tag anyone, but I do hope you’ll make such a list even if it’s just for your own eyes. A lot of times we focus on what we’re doing wrong because finding flaws is so easy (many of us even have people to help us if we can’t find them!), but it’s also useful to see what we’re doing right.
If you do post a list, please leave the link in the comments for others to find you.
Buon weekend!
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[tags]secrets of success, dogs, sunrises, trees[/tags]
Sunday Scribblings: Deepest, Darkest
Prompt #53: Deepest, darkest
In. Out. Deep breath. Here we go.
This week’s prompt is “deepest, darkest,” and perhaps since I’ve had something weighing on my mind for some months now, I immediately thought of secrets. We all have things that we’ve done or that have happened to us that we’ve told only a select person or two–or maybe even no one at all.
Through the course of writing this blog, I feel I’ve gotten to know so many new friends, and the basis of any friendship is honesty. So through this prompt’s inspiration, I’m going to come clean on something that has been churning around my stomach for months; I hope you won’t think any less of me for what I’m about to reveal.
I’ve cheated on P.
There. It’s out.
I don’t want to get into details, but it was just one time, a few months ago with an ex from here who doesn’t live in this area any more; he was visiting some family around the holidays, and well, you know how these things work.
I suppose I was waiting for those rumblings in my gut to stop, but maybe (hopefully) in time it’ll happen.
Perhaps if I confessed to P, I’d feel better?
What do you think blog friends?
***SEE COMMENTS FOR IMPORTANT ADDITIONAL INFORMATION***
Little Things Can Be Big If You Let Them
Yesterday’s meme asked me to name two random things I love about life, and it reminded me that once upon a time, I started keeping a list of such things here:
Here’s a small selection of what’s inside, tear-stained and all (click to enlarge):
Some are things probably only I enjoy and some things may not even be enjoyable to me anymore (uh, Smashmouth anyone?), but at the time I wrote it down, it made me smile.
Indeed, each entry sparks a specific image or memory in my mind–a point in life, a few words from someone I haven’t thought of in years, a feeling I couldn’t begin to put into words, in short, a part of me.
I hope you can find something there to make you smile as well.
Rising to the Challenge
OK, there must be something in the air, because I’ve been tagged again. I’m such a sucker for a good meme that I haven’t turned down a tag request yet, and here I am, keeping my streak alive.
The lovely Vanessa (from the blog that shares a name with this post) has passed along some rather unique questions from Create a Connection, an interesting site I’m just getting to know.
Here’s the Q & A:
I’m eating a leftover hamburger (w/ mayo, on wheat bread) and sautéd zucchini as I type this. What did YOU eat last?
A cappuccino and a cornetto, which normally I don’t have in the morning, but it was calling to me, and who am I to reject a Nutella-filled cornetto?
Update: I originally did this meme in the morning but then couldn’t get onto the Internet because of severe thunderstorms. Since then, I’ve eaten some minestrone. Full disclosure here on Q & A.
I am totally head-over-heels for a very tall man named James, who has a very sexy new haircut (picked out by me, of course! lol) What about YOUR love life? Anyone special?
Yes, someone affectionately known as P on this blog, but as a different, disgustingly cute nickname in real life that shall never be disclosed in a public forum. Read more about how we met here. P is about 5’10”, extremely thin even though he eats twice as much as I do, is an excellent cook, and treats Luna like a daughter (which, of course, she is).
I live in a little house, with lots of trees, on a dead-end street. What is it like where you live?
Right now I live in a redone, medieval house in a village in southern Italy overlooking the Ionian Sea. Although I won’t go into more details just yet, this may be changing—but only by a few paces down the corso, so don’t get too excited. And forget I mentioned full disclosure.
I love my hair, and my cute wittle nose. What are YOUR favourite features about yourself?
I really like my brain the best (it usually works pretty well), but physically, I suppose my hair because it’s really quite manageable so long as I keep it reasonably clean, and my eyes—even though they’re just brown, I rather like the shape and shade.
Today, I pondered about the need for mentoring in young women’s lives. What deep thoughts have YOU been pondering upon?
I’ve been thinking a lot about the Italian school system even though I don’t have any children (yet). We were discussing it in one of my English classes, and it has me thinking about what works, what doesn’t, and what I would probably have to provide for any future children with regard to education. Scary stuff.
I love cheese (cubed colby & monterey jack) and green growing things! List 2 random things you love about life.
Sliding across a tile floor in socks and climbing into fresh, warm sheets. And so many more. I actually started making a list of such things several years ago, so I think I’ll start posting some periodically.
I found CAC (Create a Connection) through Melba, who I found through A Mindful Life, which I stumbled on by doing a random search for Buddhist blogs, for no apparent reason! How did YOU find out about CAC?
I just found CAC through Vanessa who tagged me with this meme; it looks fabulous! I’m not quite sure how I found Vanessa (Sunday Scribblings perhaps?), but I’m sure glad I did.
I absolutely *heart* thunderstorms! What do YOU love most about spring?
Increased daylight, which really hadn’t been a big deal to me until this year. I just love that when I’m done teaching in the evening, it’s not pitch black and cold anymore. It also means my balcony stays warmer in the sunshine a little longer in the mornings, which is great for the plants.
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Dearest Vanessa then continued the meme party by listing 5 things about herself. Well, you all know how much I love to talk about me, so I played along with this as well, adding my own slant since I’ve already done so darn many things about me. I needed guidance, and I found some.
Five things about me connected to the 5 senses:
1. Taste. I love chocolate, but I really don’t like overly chocolate things, e.g., chocolate cake with chocolate icing. Blech.
2. Sight(ish). I have really good visualization skills, so that I can see in my mind the way I want a room to look and know that it will be something I like. P doesn’t have this so much, so when it comes time to move furniture, I have to convince him that what I see in my mind will be pretty, I swear. And then I whine for good measure.
3. Touch. I love walking with P, my arm linked through his or vice versa. I’m not sure we’d do this so much if he weren’t Italian, or if we weren’t in Italy, so I’m glad he’s him and we’re here.
4. Hearing. I absolutely hate a loud television; this is why surround sound is wasted on me. It actually sometimes makes me sick in my stomach.
5. Smell. I love, love, love the smell of onions and peppers being fried. Love. I don’t even have to eat them later as I get (mostly) full on the smell. But I eat them anyway just so they don’t feel sad.
I’m not going to tag anyone specifically, but do play along if you fancy doing so with either or both of the memes. And don’t forget to leave me a link so I can find you!
Buon weekend a tutti!
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[tags]memes[/tags]
Michelle Kaminsky is an American attorney-turned-freelance writer who lived in her family's ancestral village in Calabria, Italy for 15 years. This blog is now archived.
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