things left unsaid

Honesty by Joe Esquibel on Allposters.comI’m a fan of being honest.

And I do try to tell my loved ones how important they are to me as much as possible.

Sometimes, though, there are things you’d really like to say to someone but don’t, or can’t, for various reasons–avoidance, tact, shame, embarrassment, shyness, whatever.

I got this idea from -R- at And You Know What Else (who got it from Abbersnail who got it from NPW), and here are 15 things I haven’t said (not all to the same person of course):

1. As much as I don’t want your opinion to matter to me, it does, and it hurts.

2. I’m still sad that our friendship changed so much; I miss you terribly.

3. You don’t know how much seeing your name in my inbox makes me happy.

4. I’m sorry for what is going on with you and your family, but you created the situation.

5. I miss laughing with you *so* much.

6. I am so happy we didn’t work out. So. Very. Happy.

7. I can’t believe you’ve procreated.

8. I’ll never understand your outlook on the world, and that’s a good thing; I’d hate to see the world as you do.

9. You’re becoming your mother. Stop it.

10. I really, truly hope you are happy even though I’ll probably never speak to you again.

11. I’ll never forget the night I met you, and I will always treasure it.

12. Just thinking of you makes me smile. Always.

13. I forgive you, and you don’t even know for what. I forgive you for that too.

14. I think about you every single day at least once, usually more.

15. I’m so very sorry I’m not there watching you learn new things every day.

What haven’t you said?

Buon weekend!

34 Beans of Wisdom to “things left unsaid”
  1. 02.22.2008

    …somehow your list says everything I would say. I could even see the faces of the people to whom I would say those very things.

    It’s a strange and delightful comfort to me that you and I are so alike. It’s a blessing for me.

    Hope you had a wonderful trip, can’t wait to hear all about it and see photos!

    Scarlett & Viaggiatore

    Wanderlust Scarlett’s last blog post..Belum…

    I feel so blessed as well, cara. I’ll be happy to almost say the things you’re thinking any time ๐Ÿ˜‰

  2. 02.22.2008

    this was an emotional post. I can hear a voice saying each all with different tones behind it.

    HAVE A GREAT TIME ON YOUR VACATION! I’m excited to hear about it.

    erin’s last blog post..a birthday dinner

    Thanks Erin; I’m glad you liked the post…and stay tuned for trip info!

  3. Oh I liked this post. I could think of lots of people I would say those things to as well. Have fun on your trip!

    Wandering Chopsticks’s last blog post..Cranberry Juice-Poached Pears with Vanilla Ice Cream

    Thanks WC ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. 02.22.2008

    I love this idea! Do you mind if I use it in one of my Thursday Thirteen list?

    grace’s last blog post..The Sky Isnโ€™t Visible From Here

    Not at all Grace! Please do!

  5. 02.22.2008

    This is one of the best lists I’ve seen in so long! It reminds me of Post Secrets in a way. I’m going to write one of these lists over the weekend!

    jane’s last blog post..Coffee Haiku and a sweet little gift

    I hadn’t thought of it like Post Secrets, but you’re right; and I’ve already read your lovely list ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. 02.22.2008

    Wow, that’s deep. I think my list would be a mile long! (lol)

    Believe me, Nino, the list could be *much* longer ๐Ÿ˜‰

  7. 02.22.2008

    Jane’s comment was right. It does remind me of Post Secrets in a way. I might have to try this idea. I bite my tongue enough, there must be lots of things I haven’t said…

    kacey’s last blog post..Simple Things in Life

    Yes biting the tongue does tend to lead to longer lists of things unsaid….

  8. 02.22.2008

    Wow, this was beautiful. As I was reading it I was thinking of all the things I haven’t said as well, and so it really hit home. I’m going to borrow this from you, if you don’t mind, and do my own post next week.

    Hope you’re enjoying your little getaway!

    Karina’s last blog post..Follow-Up Friday – American Idol, Giveaways, and more

    Yes do it! Can’t wait to read it ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. This is very deep. I might have to borrow this idea as well. ๐Ÿ™‚

    nyc/caribbean ragazza’s last blog post..Meme – three writing tips and an award

    Borrow away!

  10. 02.22.2008

    Wow, that was pretty intense. It makes me think that sometimes I say too much!

    Anali’s last blog post..An Apology + A Recipe

    Hah! That’s definitely a unique reaction to this post ๐Ÿ˜‰

  11. 02.22.2008

    I love this idea, and I may copy it (giving your full credit, of course) on my own blog. It seems like it would be such a freeing experience. Just letting go and writing all of those pent-up things that you feel you can’t or shouldn’t say.

    Bella’s last blog post..How should I spend my summer?

    Please do create your own list! It is such a great exercise.

  12. 02.22.2008

    What a wonderful list. I may have to try this. Seven cracked me up, especially as I had that reaction with someone. I’ve been swamped this week – I’ve missed your blog!

    jen of a2eatwrite’s last blog post..What’s Cooking Wednesday: Philippine Savoury Pork Pies

    Boo for swamping! I’ve had the number 7 thought for more than one person unfortunately….

  13. 02.23.2008

    What a great list. It’s very moving.

    Shan’s last blog post..where did he park the mystery machine

    Thanks Shan. Great to do even if you’re not going to post it.

  14. 02.23.2008

    Brava! -I hope you are having a wonderful time on the island. You took the thoughts straight out of my book. Thank you.

    Alex’s last blog post..Pinky the House

    Alex, a wonderful time was had indeed, thanks! And thank you for your kind words.

  15. annie

    Very thought provoking. Wow, very heavy for a Friday night…
    I guess I would say some of the same things you did, Plus…

    1. You are so special to me, that whenever I think of you leaving this earth, my heart literally aches.

    2. I wish I could go inside your mind and change some things around without you knowing it.

    3. I miss the way we got along, when we were kids. Lets go back to that way of thinking.

    So many more but I’ll stop here. Thanks for making me think of what is important!

    These are some great ones Annie. The more I think about it, the more come up too. Thanks for sharing!

  16. 02.23.2008

    For some of those things, it’s probably better you didn’t say them. (I have plenty of those myself.) I imagine it’s probably very liberating to put it all down on paper (or screen). I might have to borrow this sometime.

    Cordia Amant’s last blog post..Epiphany

    Well some of them are really none of my business to say to someone else, others I *could* say, but I don’t think it would help anything. Anyway, yes, very liberating. Feel free to borrow.

  17. 02.23.2008

    Very interesting, Michelle. I keep a lot to myself. Should try this excercise.


    Paola’s last blog post..Delicious News!

    I keep a lot in too, and I like this as a way of getting some of it out without creating conflict. Try it!

  18. 02.23.2008

    Paolo, no fair. You’re supposed to add an item to the list. You are hilarious. Such an americano guy!

    Okay, here’s what I haven’t said:
    Michelle, thanks for being one of the very first people who visited my blog. I’m so happy that you did and that I discovered yours.

    Your friend, Candace

    Thanks Candace; it’s truly been a pleasure ๐Ÿ™‚

  19. 02.23.2008

    Oops. Sorry, Paolo, I mistook you for another Paolo. Time for me to turn in tonight!

    Hee hee….

  20. 02.23.2008

    Excellent !

    Pasticcera’s last blog post..“Lรข Calhรซtta dรซ Prรขl” a Valdesian Soup

    Grazie ๐Ÿ™‚

  21. 02.23.2008

    I love these lists. On yours in particular, I love #6. I hope someday I find someone who makes me want to say that to someone else. (That was a lot of “some”s in one sentence. Hope you followed that.) ๐Ÿ™‚

    Stefanie’s last blog post..I couldn’t help but wonder…

    I gotcha ๐Ÿ˜‰

  22. SabineM

    That is a fabulous post! JUST LOVE IT!

    SabineM’s last blog post..Earth Hour March 29th

    Thanks Sabine; I love the idea myself so kudos to the originator ๐Ÿ™‚

  23. 02.24.2008

    Brilliant idea…I shall try this one myself! Much thanks!

    Charlotte’s last blog post..El Sicko

    You’re very welcome ๐Ÿ™‚

  24. 02.24.2008

    Wow – I love it! Like the others…I may have to try this one…hmmmm….I may get myself in trouble! ha ha ha

    Chris’s last blog post..Chunky Applesauce

    Sometimes it’s not such a bad thing that certain people don’t read your blog ๐Ÿ˜‰

  25. 02.24.2008

    I do believe I say number 7 at least once a day at work

    Sparky Duck’s last blog post..February 21 was a good day for hotness

    Yeah some of these definitely count toward more than one person….

  26. 02.25.2008

    I love this idea and what you made of it! I’m imagining each of the 15 stories!

    Wenda’s last blog post..commitment and confidence

    It’s actually not a bad idea as writing prompts…great idea Wenda!

  27. 02.25.2008

    Great list.

    There are too many things I’d love to say to people both good and bad to list here.


    I hear you Karen. It was pretty easy coming up with these 15.

  28. 02.25.2008

    Oh what a wonderful list! I heard lots of myself in there. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Seamus’s last blog post..A Short Story

    Thanks Seamus; I’d love to see a list from you as well.

  29. Kristin

    This list is so wonderfully touching, and honest … so you. I think I know who some of them are directed towards. You may have even prompted me to make my own list, even sans blog.

    One of mine … “I really want to be you when I grow up.”

    Take a guess. – K

    Honesty is much easier in anonymity, and thank you ๐Ÿ˜‰

  30. JT

    Great stuff…I have said a few of those, but could have easily said them ALL, at one time or another.

    For me, one thing left unsaid would be:

    I am truly blessed and honored to be your friend…and I thank you for continuing to share your amazing life with me.


    I’m always fascinated reading these because so many are so widely applicable; and thank *you* so much for emailing me a few years ago ๐Ÿ™‚

  31. 02.27.2008

    I love this post! Very thought-provoking. I have thought of several unsaid things in the days since I first read this, on various themes and at various times in my life. What a great idea.

    mentalmosaic’s last blog post..Waste Mis-Management: Naplesโ€™ Ongoing Garbage Crisis

    I’ve found that the thoughts just keep flowing through my head even though I’ve already written down 15, and I’m sure they will continue to do so.

  32. 02.27.2008

    Good idea. I bet it feels good to do, even knowing the people you are speaking to probably wont read it.

    Taffiny it was definitely more liberating than I thought it would be. Amazing what just getting those things “out” can do.

  1. [...] Left Unsaid 22 02 2008 I’m shamelessly lifting this idea from Ms Bleeding Espresso (she li...
  2. [...] 26, 2008 Iโ€™m lifting thisย from Charlotte’s Web who shamelessly lifted it from Ms Bleeding Esp...
Michelle KaminskyMichelle Kaminsky is an American attorney-turned-freelance writer who lived in her family's ancestral village in Calabria, Italy for 15 years. This blog is now archived. 

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Homemade apple butter
Green beans, potatoes, and pancetta
Glazed Apple Oatmeal Cinnamon Muffins
Pasta with snails alla calabrese
Onion, Oregano, and Thyme Focaccia
Oatmeal Banana Craisin Muffins
Prosciutto wrapped watermelon with bel paese cheese
Fried eggs with red onion and cheese
Calabrian sausage and fava beans
Ricotta Pound Cake