Bleeding Espresso

22 February 2008

things left unsaid

I’m a fan of being honest.

And I do try to tell my loved ones how important they are to me as much as possible.

Sometimes, though, there are things you’d really like to say to someone but don’t, or can’t, for various reasons–avoidance, tact, shame, embarrassment, shyness, whatever.

I got this idea from -R- at And You Know What Else (who got it from Abbersnail who got it from NPW), and here are 15 things I haven’t said (not all to the same person of course):

1. As much as I don’t want your opinion to matter to me, it does, and it hurts.

2. I’m still sad that our friendship changed so much; I miss you terribly.

3. You don’t know how much seeing your name in my inbox makes me happy.

4. I’m sorry for what is going on with you and your family, but you created the situation.

5. I miss laughing with you *so* much.

6. I am so happy we didn’t work out. So. Very. Happy.

7. I can’t believe you’ve procreated.

8. I’ll never understand your outlook on the world, and that’s a good thing; I’d hate to see the world as you do.

9. You’re becoming your mother. Stop it.

10. I really, truly hope you are happy even though I’ll probably never speak to you again.

11. I’ll never forget the night I met you, and I will always treasure it.

12. Just thinking of you makes me smile. Always.

13. I forgive you, and you don’t even know for what. I forgive you for that too.

14. I think about you every single day at least once, usually more.

15. I’m so very sorry I’m not there watching you learn new things every day.

What haven’t you said?

Buon weekend!

34 beans of wisdom »

34 beans of wisdom to “things left unsaid”

Wanderlust Scarlett on 22 Feb 2008 at 7:49 am #

…somehow your list says everything I would say. I could even see the faces of the people to whom I would say those very things.

It’s a strange and delightful comfort to me that you and I are so alike. It’s a blessing for me.

Hope you had a wonderful trip, can’t wait to hear all about it and see photos!

Scarlett & Viaggiatore

Wanderlust Scarlett’s last blog post..Belum…

I feel so blessed as well, cara. I’ll be happy to almost say the things you’re thinking any time
erin on 22 Feb 2008 at 8:22 am #

this was an emotional post. I can hear a voice saying each all with different tones behind it.

HAVE A GREAT TIME ON YOUR VACATION! I’m excited to hear about it.

erin’s last blog post..a birthday dinner

Thanks Erin; I’m glad you liked the post…and stay tuned for trip info!
Wandering Chopsticks on 22 Feb 2008 at 9:28 am #

Oh I liked this post. I could think of lots of people I would say those things to as well. Have fun on your trip!

Wandering Chopsticks’s last blog post..Cranberry Juice-Poached Pears with Vanilla Ice Cream

Thanks WC
grace on 22 Feb 2008 at 11:15 am #

I love this idea! Do you mind if I use it in one of my Thursday Thirteen list?

grace’s last blog post..The Sky Isn’t Visible From Here

Not at all Grace! Please do!
jane on 22 Feb 2008 at 2:04 pm #

This is one of the best lists I’ve seen in so long! It reminds me of Post Secrets in a way. I’m going to write one of these lists over the weekend!

jane’s last blog post..Coffee Haiku and a sweet little gift

I hadn’t thought of it like Post Secrets, but you’re right; and I’ve already read your lovely list
Ninotchka on 22 Feb 2008 at 2:13 pm #

Wow, that’s deep. I think my list would be a mile long! (lol)

Believe me, Nino, the list could be *much* longer
Things Left Unsaid « Charlotte’s Web on 22 Feb 2008 at 2:13 pm #

[...] Left Unsaid 22 02 2008 I’m shamelessly lifting this idea from Ms Bleeding Espresso (she lives in Italy and bleeds coffee!). It is a list of 15 things I haven’t said over the [...]
kacey on 22 Feb 2008 at 3:07 pm #

Jane’s comment was right. It does remind me of Post Secrets in a way. I might have to try this idea. I bite my tongue enough, there must be lots of things I haven’t said…

kacey’s last blog post..Simple Things in Life

Yes biting the tongue does tend to lead to longer lists of things unsaid….
Karina on 22 Feb 2008 at 4:57 pm #

Wow, this was beautiful. As I was reading it I was thinking of all the things I haven’t said as well, and so it really hit home. I’m going to borrow this from you, if you don’t mind, and do my own post next week.

Hope you’re enjoying your little getaway!

Karina’s last blog post..Follow-Up Friday - American Idol, Giveaways, and more

Yes do it! Can’t wait to read it
nyc/caribbean ragazza on 22 Feb 2008 at 5:34 pm #

This is very deep. I might have to borrow this idea as well.

nyc/caribbean ragazza’s last blog post..Meme - three writing tips and an award

Borrow away!
Anali on 22 Feb 2008 at 8:04 pm #

Wow, that was pretty intense. It makes me think that sometimes I say too much!

Anali’s last blog post..An Apology + A Recipe

Hah! That’s definitely a unique reaction to this post
Bella on 22 Feb 2008 at 9:33 pm #

I love this idea, and I may copy it (giving your full credit, of course) on my own blog. It seems like it would be such a freeing experience. Just letting go and writing all of those pent-up things that you feel you can’t or shouldn’t say.

Bella’s last blog post..How should I spend my summer?

Please do create your own list! It is such a great exercise.
jen of a2eatwrite on 22 Feb 2008 at 10:58 pm #

What a wonderful list. I may have to try this. Seven cracked me up, especially as I had that reaction with someone. I’ve been swamped this week - I’ve missed your blog!

jen of a2eatwrite’s last blog post..What’s Cooking Wednesday: Philippine Savoury Pork Pies

Boo for swamping! I’ve had the number 7 thought for more than one person unfortunately….
Shan on 23 Feb 2008 at 1:11 am #

What a great list. It’s very moving.

Shan’s last blog post..where did he park the mystery machine

Thanks Shan. Great to do even if you’re not going to post it.
Alex on 23 Feb 2008 at 2:50 am #

Brava! -I hope you are having a wonderful time on the island. You took the thoughts straight out of my book. Thank you.

Alex’s last blog post..Pinky the House

Alex, a wonderful time was had indeed, thanks! And thank you for your kind words.
annie on 23 Feb 2008 at 3:14 am #

Very thought provoking. Wow, very heavy for a Friday night…
I guess I would say some of the same things you did, Plus…

1. You are so special to me, that whenever I think of you leaving this earth, my heart literally aches.

2. I wish I could go inside your mind and change some things around without you knowing it.

3. I miss the way we got along, when we were kids. Lets go back to that way of thinking.

So many more but I’ll stop here. Thanks for making me think of what is important!

These are some great ones Annie. The more I think about it, the more come up too. Thanks for sharing!
Cordia Amant on 23 Feb 2008 at 4:56 am #

For some of those things, it’s probably better you didn’t say them. (I have plenty of those myself.) I imagine it’s probably very liberating to put it all down on paper (or screen). I might have to borrow this sometime.

Cordia Amant’s last blog post..Epiphany

Well some of them are really none of my business to say to someone else, others I *could* say, but I don’t think it would help anything. Anyway, yes, very liberating. Feel free to borrow.
Paola on 23 Feb 2008 at 7:23 am #

Very interesting, Michelle. I keep a lot to myself. Should try this excercise.

paola

Paola’s last blog post..Delicious News!

I keep a lot in too, and I like this as a way of getting some of it out without creating conflict. Try it!
Italian Woman on 23 Feb 2008 at 9:28 am #

Paolo, no fair. You’re supposed to add an item to the list. You are hilarious. Such an americano guy!

Okay, here’s what I haven’t said:
Michelle, thanks for being one of the very first people who visited my blog. I’m so happy that you did and that I discovered yours.

Your friend, Candace

Thanks Candace; it’s truly been a pleasure
Italian Woman on 23 Feb 2008 at 9:31 am #

Oops. Sorry, Paolo, I mistook you for another Paolo. Time for me to turn in tonight!

Hee hee….
Pasticcera on 23 Feb 2008 at 5:23 pm #

Excellent !

Pasticcera’s last blog post..“Lâ Calhëtta dë Prâl” a Valdesian Soup

Grazie
Stefanie on 23 Feb 2008 at 6:24 pm #

I love these lists. On yours in particular, I love #6. I hope someday I find someone who makes me want to say that to someone else. (That was a lot of “some”s in one sentence. Hope you followed that.)

Stefanie’s last blog post..I couldn’t help but wonder…

I gotcha
SabineM on 23 Feb 2008 at 8:07 pm #

That is a fabulous post! JUST LOVE IT!

SabineM’s last blog post..Earth Hour March 29th

Thanks Sabine; I love the idea myself so kudos to the originator
Charlotte on 24 Feb 2008 at 12:52 am #

Brilliant idea…I shall try this one myself! Much thanks!

Charlotte’s last blog post..El Sicko

You’re very welcome
Chris on 24 Feb 2008 at 4:07 am #

Wow - I love it! Like the others…I may have to try this one…hmmmm….I may get myself in trouble! ha ha ha

Chris’s last blog post..Chunky Applesauce

Sometimes it’s not such a bad thing that certain people don’t read your blog
Sparky Duck on 24 Feb 2008 at 5:36 pm #

I do believe I say number 7 at least once a day at work

Sparky Duck’s last blog post..February 21 was a good day for hotness

Yeah some of these definitely count toward more than one person….
Wenda on 25 Feb 2008 at 12:44 am #

I love this idea and what you made of it! I’m imagining each of the 15 stories!

Wenda’s last blog post..commitment and confidence

It’s actually not a bad idea as writing prompts…great idea Wenda!
Karen Cole on 25 Feb 2008 at 3:49 am #

Great list.

There are too many things I’d love to say to people both good and bad to list here.

Karen Cole’s last blog post..THE SLIGHTLY OLDER THAN HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS GO TO THE FRIDA KAHLO EXHIBIT…….AND ART CAMP POST

I hear you Karen. It was pretty easy coming up with these 15.
Seamus on 25 Feb 2008 at 5:23 pm #

Oh what a wonderful list! I heard lots of myself in there.

Seamus’s last blog post..A Short Story

Thanks Seamus; I’d love to see a list from you as well.
Kristin on 25 Feb 2008 at 8:26 pm #

This list is so wonderfully touching, and honest … so you. I think I know who some of them are directed towards. You may have even prompted me to make my own list, even sans blog.

One of mine … “I really want to be you when I grow up.”

Take a guess. - K

Honesty is much easier in anonymity, and thank you
JT on 26 Feb 2008 at 6:46 am #

Great stuff…I have said a few of those, but could have easily said them ALL, at one time or another.

For me, one thing left unsaid would be:

I am truly blessed and honored to be your friend…and I thank you for continuing to share your amazing life with me.

JT

I’m always fascinated reading these because so many are so widely applicable; and thank *you* so much for emailing me a few years ago
Things Left Unsaid « Kerry’s Khaos on 26 Feb 2008 at 3:03 pm #

[...] 26, 2008 I’m lifting this from Charlotte’s Web who shamelessly lifted it from Ms Bleeding Espresso. It is a list of 15 things I haven’t said over the years to various people, for fear of hurting [...]
mentalmosaic on 27 Feb 2008 at 12:04 am #

I love this post! Very thought-provoking. I have thought of several unsaid things in the days since I first read this, on various themes and at various times in my life. What a great idea.

mentalmosaic’s last blog post..Waste Mis-Management: Naples’ Ongoing Garbage Crisis

I’ve found that the thoughts just keep flowing through my head even though I’ve already written down 15, and I’m sure they will continue to do so.
Taffiny on 27 Feb 2008 at 1:13 am #

Good idea. I bet it feels good to do, even knowing the people you are speaking to probably wont read it.

Taffiny it was definitely more liberating than I thought it would be. Amazing what just getting those things “out” can do.