Top 5 Italian Words You Really Don’t Want to Mispronounce
Italian flag on Ben Franklin Parkway in Philadelphia
This is a topic often batted around among those of us trying to get used to Italy–probably even more so than complaints about Italian bureaucracy. And that’s saying something.
Whether you’re coming to Italy for your first or twenty-first time, ready to meet your future in-laws, trying to impress your new Italian amore, or just in the mood to laugh *with* us as we maneuver our way through the beautiful Italian language, I have compiled for you:
The Top 5 Italian Words
You Really Don’t Want to Mispronounce
1. Fico: noun, fig (or fig tree). Succulent and sweet, we all love figs, right? Yeah, well, just be sure you keep this one in the masculine form (ending in “o”) because once you change it to fica or figa, you’ve gone and referenced (in quite a vulgar way) a part of the female anatomy that rhymes with bagina. Incidentally, if you want to say a guy is attractive or if something is generally cool, you can say “figo.” That’s not obscene but the way I figure, why mess with it?
2. Penne: noun, can mean penne, as in the pasta, or pens (singular is penna). Some background: the Italian language has this funny thing whereby you must actually pronounce every letter that appears in a word. And so this word is “pen-ne.” Our ears may not hear the difference between pronouncing the double consonant and not, but Italian ears sure do — especially in this word, which if pronounced “pene“ means penis (or, if you prefer, a part of the male anatomy that rhymes with schmenis). Subtle difference in pronunciation and yet huge difference in meaning.
3. Pisolino: noun, nap. Speaking of man parts, be careful to pronounce this one exactly as written with that long “o” in the middle. If you get lazy, you might be saying “pisellino,” which although literally means “small pea” and is what Popeye’s Swee’Pea is called in Italian, is aslo slang for a tiny pene. So, to sum up, take a nap, not a small schmenis.
4. Scappare: verb, to escape. Another example where you must be careful to pronounce the middle vowel clearly because if you say “devo scopare,” you’re telling someone that you have to go sweep (e.g., the floor). Not so bad, you say? Well, the other meaning for scopare is a slang, quite vulgar term for, um, making love, and may not be something you’d like to share with, say, your mother-in-law.
5. Scoraggiare: verb, to discourage. Mispronounce this one so that you say “scoreggiare“ and you’re referring to passing gas in a not so nice way (assuming there is a nice way). Many an English as a Foreign/Second Language teacher has probably done this one when trying to tell students not to be discouraged. Eh. This is how we show students it’s OK to make mistakes while learning a language. Right? Right?
Believe you me, there are so many more, but aside from all the ancient ruins, Renaissance artwork, processions and festivals, and olive, lemon, and orange groves, the challenge of the Italian language is just a small part of what makes life in Italy fun and exciting.
Kinda makes you want to come to Italy and learn Italian, doesn’t it?
What are some of your embarrassing foreign language mistakes?
82 Beans of Wisdom to “Top 5 Italian Words You Really Don’t Want to Mispronounce”
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Michelle Fabio is an American attorney-turned-freelance writer living in her family's ancestral village in Calabria, Italy and savoring simplicity one sip at a time.
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Good Lord, you could really get ‘scorragiare’ and the other one in a muddle! Be careful about these ones – calzone (a kind of pizza that you fold in half) and cazzone (a part of the male body that tends to be on the larger size). I’ve already seen a post on a BBC site about a couple of girls who asked their waiter in Bologna ‘vorrei un bel cazzone’.
Oh, and false friends! Last time I was in Bari I told my friend Bartolo’s 75 year-old mother ‘sono molte eccitata di tornare in Italia’ and she gave a knowing laugh. It took me years to discover that ‘eccitata’ does mean excited, but of the love-making variety. Luckily she’s a broad-mined Catholic lady (I use tu not Lei with her) and she just laughed.
In Japanese you need to be careful with the words ‘kutsu’ (shoes) and ‘ketsu’ (ass – and I don’t mean no baby donkey!). I asked the ladies at yoga if they liked my new ass recently and they shrieked with laughter.
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Emsk, you offer *excellent* advice. I’ll probably just refrain from ordering calzone just to be on the safe side
Your own blunders are hilarious–it’s good to know the Japanese women just loved your new ass, isn’t it?
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I love this thread. Reminds me of when I took my brand-new bride away from her life of luxury in Pasadena, CA, and landed her in a dusty flat in Brindisi for three years. I came home from work one day to find her very upset about this man who kept making obscene phone calls to her (we had one of the few phones in our neighborhood – back in the 1980′s). She could only understand that he wanted to do something to her figs, or so she thought. Not so happy was she when I explained the joke…next time, she answered the phone, “Hello?” instead of the usual “Pronto – chi parla?” and the prankster got so flustered that he hung up and never called again. Another time, I sent her to the dealer to pick up a part for our car, specifically, a windshield washer pump. She called me to tell me to do it myself, because she walked into the dealer and asked for a “pompa di spezzatore” and the parts guys couldn’t stop laughing – then she asked our neighbour and found out why. Ah, the glories of cultural exchange!
Our next three years (this decade) in Italy went much smoother, but my teenage son kept ordering “pizzaroni” instead of “salumi”, because he knew that he didn’t want pepperoni, and thought he didn’t want salami! Luckily, the pizzaiolo was a gentile, understanding guy…
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Mimi Torchia Boothby Watercolors Reply:
January 4th, 2012 at 11:03 pm
so what IS spezzatore?
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*Cercando, hilarious! Love the language memories–and I love that we all have them (whether they’re ours or someone else’s)
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Hee – I love this list! I have a story to add… in my Italian class in Florence, we were all describing traditional holidays from our countries. I chose Thanksgiving, and at the time not knowing the word for turkey (tacchino), I said that every November Americans sit around the table e mangiamo un uccelone….
I thought it just meant big bird, but apparently it has a secondary meaning that’s a little more risque… a big pene. My teacher lost it, though the rest of the class just looked blank.
girlie’s last blog post..Ah, DC. Let’s get some Spanish food!
Hah! Still, that was awfully genius of you to come up with that word IMHO
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what annoys me is the reverse ………. having lived here so long I know exactly how to pronounce bruschetta and risotto etc – but it drives me crazy when I watch a food programme in English on tv and hear brushetta and ris-oat-oh instead !!!
So true Lorna! Thanks for stopping by
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I can’t believe no one’s mentioned this one yet – but the difference between “anno” and “ano” is pretty immense (year vs. ass). For double consonants like this one, I usually go with “annnnnnnnno” just to be extra-safe!
And I’ve heard that “casalingua” means something bad (while “casalinga” is just housewife), but I don’t know what the former actually means. Do you?
Jessica, Italy Logue’s last blog post..Italy Photo of the Week: Market Day
Hah, that’s a good one Jessica! I think I was well warned with the double consonants so I haven’t had too much problems in that area.
As for “casalingua,” there’s a good description here (about 3/4 down): Il Forno.
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Andrew M Reply:
January 5th, 2012 at 2:57 pm
I think most English speakers can’t hear the difference between the single and double consonant sound. I got chuckles for months while explaining that I was in Italy for “just one year” until I figured it out.
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michelle Reply:
January 10th, 2012 at 9:35 am
Yes, those double consonants are probably one of the strangest things for us to get used to…but one mistake is all it takes to learn the difference pretty quickly!
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Ha! Just read that post. Too funny… I’ll try not to screw that one up.
Jessica, Italy Logue’s last blog post..Italian News Snippets: 06.01.08
Definitely a good plan Jessica
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Very funny situation with mispronounciations in languages that are new to us. Yours highlights exactly the problems that can be caused with them. the same at my end, on e night when I got spirits given to me instead of chickens as the word for both is very similar.
Thanks for sharing this.
httP://bulgariaslivatree.com
martin miller-yianni’s last blog post..Another Bulgarian Meal to Remember
Hah! I hope you enjoyed the drinks at least
Thanks for stopping by!
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I’ve got my own list to add to yours. I can never mess up without making a sexual innuendo by mistake. It’s a curse.
Miss Expatria’s last blog post..My Two Cents: The New TSA-Friendly Laptop Bags
Ooh thanks for sharing!
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Loved this post! I have only just discovered your blog. I am sure I have made many of those errors already… I usually qualify my translations to my English speaking guests with “I HOPE I just said…”
Kay’s last blog post..almost
Welcome Kay! Lucky for us Italians are usually quite forgiving when we butcher their beautiful language
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When I was learning, for mustache, I used to say “buffi” instead of “baffi”, and I’ve made the ‘fico’ mistake. lol
Catherine
That’s a bad one
.-= Catherine´s last blog ..Canto della Terra =-.
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when our then 6 year-old daughter was learning Italian in Rome, she was terrified of screwing up ‘penne.’ Or even worse–”anno’ versus ‘ano.’
Those are definitely tricky ones!
.-= Jack´s last blog ..This may launch me over the cuckoo’s nest =-.
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Not as embarrassing as your examples, but I have a fun one.
One of my favorite stories from my travels to Italy comes from the day that we hiked into Il Parco Naturalistico di San Floriano. In the park there is a small stand which sells seasonal fruits and goods such as olive oil, honey, etc. As we entered the park, a woman ran out to the stand, waiving at us. We had planned to hike around the park for an hour or so and hadn’t planned on buying anything while we were there. We stopped by to see what they had and attempted to buy honey, ‘Miele’. I also pointed out a small bottle of oil that I wanted. When ringing us up, she inadvertently did not charge us for the honey. I tried to tell her and in pointing out the receipt, she understood only that I thought that something was missing. She was flustered and hurried out of the booth toward the barn. It was abrupt and a little unsettling. We waited a minute but then set out on our hike with the honey and oil. About 5 minutes down the path we heard her calling to us as she ran to catch up to us carrying two HUGE bags of apples, ‘Mele’. So, needless to say, we thanked her for the apples, tried to pay her for them and carried about 12 lbs. of apples around for an hour and a half. I made a t shirt to commemorate the day. It says Mele, Miele, Mille (‘Many’). It’s a fun memory and now a story that I share almost every time that I wear the shirt.
Love it Tracie, thanks!
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A much needed post Michelle!
One of my many embarassing slip-ups in Italian was with a group of my husband’s friends, of course, all male. I was explaining to them that the salamis in Italy are so much better than in the U.S. They didn’t understand why. I explained that for one thing, the salamis in the U.S. all have “preservativi”. When they all laughed I knew I had blown it. Preservativi means condoms. What I wanted to say was “conservativi” (preservatives.) Hee hee.
Classic Jeni; thanks for sharing
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At the time that I mistakingly used the wrong word I was 3 years old and had just moved bake to Sicily from Canada , so I only knew a few english words which to my innocent understanding at that age would work in both Sicilian and english.
My Uncle Giovannoi was taking me for a walk when I spotted the icecream store, so I yelled out ascreama, meaning Ice cream, to my uncle he thought I was refering to the part in my hair.So he whipped out his comb and procceded to repart my part. This caused this then 3 yearold to have a tantram and continue to ask for the ascreama.My other uncle Poalino had a Barber shop close by and so my uncle Giovanni took me to him and said this child is very upset about her hairpart do something, to at that point I was wailing.So my uncle Paolino tried combing my hair, a man walked in from the states who was visiting and said what is all this comoition why is the child sobbing, we can’t seen to part her hair the way she wants it, finally he said to me” che voi” and I said through tears” ascreama”, he translated she wants an icecream, gelato not a hair part. OH>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>! Its one of my uncle Giovanni’s favoriate stories to tell about me.
Haha I can see why! Thanks for sharing, Nell
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One that amused my German mother-in-law was Bogenscheissen instead of Bogenschiessen.
I could never understand the if catfish was katzenfisch, why wasn’t butterfly butterflegel?
Aren’t languages fun?!
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How about “gallera” and “galleria”? A friend of mine told a caller that she would have to call her back since she was in jail (gallera) and had bad reception. She meant to say galleria (tunnel).
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michelle Reply:
January 4th, 2012 at 10:12 pm
Nice one, Pat! Quite a difference indeed
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Ah, yes, giggles and embarrassment. I was so excited because we were having our garage built. On the top of the roof they put a rooster shaped weather vane. As I searched for the right words to describe the rooster, I realized no one was listening because I had called il tetto la tetta and they could not stop laughing. Then I went on to the door and failed there too. Tears came to eyes.
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Dining in Trastevere with friends, some Italian, on my first trip to Italy, I decided to order fried artichokes. Instead of carciofi, however, I ordered cervelli. Every pair of eyes at the table turned to give me a most skeptical gaze, and I realized immediately something was terribly wrong. Got it straightened out…thankfully!
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http://www.seeyouinitaly.com/blog/?p=918 extolls virtue of my italian dictionary that signals “false friends” words designed to trip you up by seeming to be so logically the right word.
but the confusion can be half the fun, no? How about a nice refreshing glass of fish on a hot day. Yes, i have ordered a “succa di pesche” vs pesca. hardly seems right. and of course in the context of your top 5 words don’t forget uccellino. this little bird can be a conversation stopper in the right setting.
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I think one of my favorite personal mistakes was saying “che cazzo” instead of “che pazzo”. Woopsie!
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I have made several errors in my attempts to speak italian in Italy but one of my more glaring boo-boos was the time that I was trying to explain to my Italian relatives that in America we put preservatives in wine while in Italy they do not. I did not know the word for preservative so I took a chance and hoped that it might be similar to the English word. I tentatively stated that there was “preservetivi” in American wine only to realize after everyone started to laugh that what I actually said was that there were condoms in American wine. I later found out that the Italian word for preservative is conservativo.
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I was visiting a Latin American country and one of our host families had a death in the family. In Latin American countries they bury the dead right away because they don’t embalm. I was trying to explain that we use preservatives in the U.S., and I used the word “preservativo”. (Should have been preservante.) Preservativo means condom, so I basically told everyone that in the U.S. we put condoms on dead people. Ugh!
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michelle Reply:
May 3rd, 2012 at 9:55 am
Haha that’s a good one, Tina — I mean, looking back on it. I’m sure it was mortifying (no pun intended) at the time
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