let the answering begin: the sequel

28 CommentsTuesday • July 17, 2007 • by michelle

Sequel you ask? Why yes!

The original “let the answering begin!” can be found here, and that explains what this is all about, but for those who missed it and don’t feel like clicking:

A while back, I asked you what you would like to know about me so I could fill out the 8 things meme that JennieBoo tagged me with, and you responded. I’ve already answered 6 questions, which you can find here, and now here are five more.

Today’s topics are two very unrelated ones: my Calabrian fiancé P and the United States. They don’t even share a language, but in my world, they get to share a post! Whee!

(1) One of my most favoritist bloggers in France, Meredith of Poppy Fields, asked me whether I’ve married my “beau” or if it’s something I’m planning on doing.

No need to start out small, eh?

Well the first part is easy. We’re not married.

The second part is a little more complicated, but I’d say we’re 85-90% “for” getting married. It’s not really a big deal for either of us religiously or even emotionally (sorry for those who don’t like to see “the just a piece a paper” thing but . . . I do imagine that at some point we will make it official.

I talked briefly about some possible wedding plans here, but there’s nothing officially planned. Next summer is a possibility though.

For anyone not familiar with the odd engagement procedure (at least to me) in Italy, basically you’re fidanzati or “engaged” when the relationship is serious. There’s often no real proposal or ring, so with P and me, we’ve pretty much been engaged since about Day 2 following the whole fateful wind-blown jean jacket thing.

But let’s just call the engagement procedure a cross-cultural difference and move along.

(2) While we’re on the subject of P, One Smart Cookie asked me what he’s like and to name my favorite thing about him.

P gets short-changed a bit on the blog–mostly by his choice, of course–so I thank Ms Cookie for the opportunity to brag a bit.

P is probably someone you wouldn’t notice in a crowd because he’s a keen observer and quiet in groups (except with his closest friends of course). In line with that is that he’s quite pensive and sensitive even though most people who know him wouldn’t think that. And, despite being quiet and a bit shy, he’s actually quite demonstrative of his feelings for me, both verbally and physically.

He’s thoughtful to a fault, always worrying about whether I’m taken care of before he thinks of taking care of himself. One day after we met but before either of us had expressed any kind of feelings, I was walking to the grocery store when I saw him up ahead run toward an older woman struggling to carry her groceries. He didn’t know I was watching as his back was to me and he couldn’t have seen me coming, but that innocent scene? I won’t say it’s the moment I fell in love with him, but I was definitely on the way.

And he’s just sweet–if he goes somewhere without me, he always brings me something back, and I don’t mean he buys something. We’re not exactly rolling in cash and I’m not one for expensive shows of affection anyway (good combo, eh?), so I’m always so touched when he comes home with a perfect shell from the beach after he’s been fishing or the first almond blossom of the season from our tree.

He’s also smart and handsome, makes me laugh *a lot*, can fix just about anything, is an excellent cook, and knows that he should remain calm when I’m freaking out.

The best thing I like about him? He makes me feel so very, truly loved each and every day.

(3) Shifting gears but not questioners, One Smart Cookie also asked how frequently I visit the United States and when I visit, what I can’t wait to see/eat/visit/do.

I haven’t been back to the US since February-June 2004. I want to go back to visit, it just hasn’t happened yet for various reasons, not the least of which being the expense.

The thing I enjoy doing most when I go home is spending time with my family and friends, doing all the stuff that I used to do everyday with them: yard sales on Saturday mornings, trying all different restaurants with my mom, hanging out in Dunkin’ Donuts, Italian restaurants, or friends’ houses to talk and talk and talk. Catching up, generally.

Ah, and I also look forward to eating everything that my mom cooks and bakes. I’ve posted a list of what I miss about the States, but the longer I’m here, the less important those “things” are, and it’s really only the people I miss terribly.

(4) Related to “home” questions, Anno asked “When you think of home, where is it?” and whether I think I’ll return to the States.

Cheesy answers acceptable? Good.

My home is truly where my heart is. I’ve learned over the years that I can make a home anywhere that my heart is committed to, and a lot of my heart is here. P is a big part of that, of course, so I’m comfortable with saying this is my home. Indeed, if I were in the US visiting, I’d know I’d refer to here as home.

That said, the house and town where I grew up in America will always be my home too–a lot of my heart is there as well. And I refer to it as “home” when I’m here. No one ever said you couldn’t have two (or more) homes, right? Life is too short for arbitrary decisions, I say!

Do I think I’ll return to the States? To live permanently? Probably not. Even though it’s not all cappuccino and afternoon naps on this side of the pond, I am really, genuinely happy here. Plus I can’t imagine moving my whole life again, but I suppose never say never.

(5) And last but certainly not least for today, the always lovely and inspiring SomePinkFlowers wants to know:

what did you do/ with all your childhood STUFF/ when you moved to italy?/all those bits of memory things…/ i guess what i’m asking is this,/ are there bits of your life still stored/ in the states somewhere/or/ did you majorly purge/ and then move everything left completely…/ i am thinking christmas ornaments,/ high school annuals, dental charts,/ those typoes of things…/ whatwhowhenhow?/[one question, really.].

I think you can see why I didn’t paraphrase. Isn’t that just a beautiful question?

Anyway, I have a lot of stuff in a storage unit back in America–formerly my mom’s basement until she moved into an apartment. Now we are renting something out until I get back, clean it out, keep and ship (or pack) what I want, and purge the rest.

What’s in there? Well, I have *so* many books, including old textbooks from college and law school that I’d love to have here, but I don’t know if they’ll ever all make it. My Kennedy research collection, yearbooks, photo albums, loose photos, my grandmother’s things, items from church rituals (Baptism, Communion, Confirmation), old report cards, ceramics I made in high school, paintings, drawings, journals, newspaper clippings, memory boxes, holiday decorations, many cards and notes and letters, a collection of baseball memorabilia (old catcher’s masks, shoes, balls, posters). . . .

Not a whole lot from actual childhood, although there are still some random toys and whatnot in my father’s attic. Maybe. My children’s books were damaged in a roof leak, unfortunately, and that’s all that was really important to me of that stuff.

My master plan, to link all of today’s questions together in fact, is that someday P and I will travel to America and spend a few days going through this stuff so I can decide what to do with it once and for all.

He’ll have *so* much fun!

I didn’t mention that he can be rather impatient up in Number 2, did I? Ah, selective descriptioning.

Until next time, then.